18 Eylül 2009, Cuma
saat: 16:29
oops i did it.
it's simple and concise, unlike what merry would probably write.
although i am more indecisive about it than ever.
there are so many options, so many roads i can take that for the fear of making a mistake i am leaning towards doing nothing.
nostalgic.
what scares me about going to grad school is that it will not be the same. i was so freaking lucky in college that maybe it ruined it for me. ha. this time i know that merry won't be on a conference call with obama next door when i am trying to write my thesis in my little room i loved so much. to take a break, i won't be able to go through the bathroom to the next room to find mattie standing up with a beer in her hand, arguing about some right-wing issue with martin sitting on the blue exercise ball while anna is typing fervently and murmuring to herself about her hp or the orient. alyssa won't be barging into my room about the trip she planned, or meg won't bring a bagel when i am too sick to leave my room. it's probably not accurate, but i imagine grad school to be dark and rainy, with a lot of one-on-one time with computers or rats in dim labs.
i've been working on my resume for the past year, and have at least fifteen versions of it but i remembered about my brief animal care taker stint last night. it's not important, i probably won't even put it there but it's weird that i didn't remember it. once i had to call bryan because i couldn't go into the lobster room because someone had turned the lights off. i hadn't necessarily called bryan actually, but he was always in our room and he had picked up the phone. and i am not usually scared of the dark or anything but that small dark room with three aquariums filled with lobsters and crabs scared the hell out of me with weird water noises. it felt like i would be going underwater in the dark with those creatures and noone could hear me in the building. he had come in and flicked the lights on and i had introduced him to my not-cuddly friends. this way i could pinpoint that i had worked there during spring semester of freshman year because come sophomore year bryan and i weren't talking. i was being a bitch, and he was being a self-deprecating loser then. i still kinda mourn that friendship going to waste.
i like to reminisce.
oh the holy holidays are upon us and i have to move again.
